The prime crime

In the country called 'Rabath' ... (biggest democrazy in the world)

At the city called 'Allarebad' ... (you should not read it separately as 'all are bad', it’s ‘Allarebad’)

A police vehicle was speeding through the road at 7.00 a.m.

The driver of the vehicle was color blind, I am sure, then why he kept on going even when the traffic lights were red?

A 'double decked' bus was also speeding in front of the police vehicle. The driver, who kept on Chain-honking, lowered the window glass to spit out the ‘Paan’ated saliva, along with a serial-blast of bad words directed at 'paa' of the 'double decked' bus driver.

Suddenly, the big bus turned into a narrow twenty feet road and stopped, clearing the way for the police vehicle. The police driver let out victory laughter.

Policeman 'A' said to the driver, “Please stop. I have to draw some money”

“At what shop?" - Driver.

“ATM” – said policeman ‘A’.

“Oh! You want to 'draw' your 'own' money!!” exclaimed driver and stopped at an ATM.

Policeman ‘A’ shouted at the watchman, “Open the door”

Watchman opened the ATM door.

One person, with a big bag on the shoulder was staring the machine. Another was lying on the floor.

“Got boozed so early in the morning? Crazy people!” commented the policeman ‘A’. He pushed the ‘bag’ man aside and typed his PIN.  The ATM machine replied “oops! No money honey! I am out of order as usual!”

He cursed the machine with unparliamentary words and left

Then the vehicle came to a halt in front of an apartment located near a crowded market.

Policeman ‘B’ inquired the watchman, “In which apartment Mr. All Right lives?”

Watchman said “In 2 B an old couple lives. Right opposite to is 2 A, where Mr.All Right lives alone”

Policeman ‘B’ knocked 2 B.  A teen aged boy opened the door. He heard the cricket commentary was screaming loudly from the hall television.

“Hey boy! What is the score?” asked Policeman ‘B’.

“Kapistan batting. Two wickets gone” – boy said.

Policeman “B’ was so pleased to hear that.

“Where is Mr.All Right” – asked policeman ‘B’

“I have never heard of him” the boy said

“Is this 2A?” asked the policeman ‘B’.

“I don’t know” said the boy.

“Poor boy! I will check myself”. He checked the door plate. It said ‘2B’.

“Sorry boy. Enjoy the cricket!” said the policeman ‘B’ and moved towards the ‘2A’.

O.K, now let us read some news from the next day paper named ‘The Religion’.

News on page five,

                                        “Double rape on double-decker”

‘Young lovers , both had been raped in a ‘double decker’ bus. Rape is so common in our country, but why we are reporting this incident is the ‘boy friend’ also has been raped, which is first of its kind. Both the lovers were brought into the police custody of ‘Moral’ police station and questioned rigorously regarding the reason for going alone in a bus so early in the morning (i.e, 7.15 A.M) without the knowledge of their parents. Police is also searching the rapists in the hope that, if they were captured, the crucial information ‘why the lovers left home so early alone’ could be extracted from them. If proved guilty, they (i.e, the lovers not the rapists) would be sentenced one year imprisonment and lifetime ‘media’ ‘tarnish’ment.

News on page two,

                                               “Twin blast in ATM”

Two men tried to ‘blast’ open a ATM machine, which has not been working for past one month. They drugged the watchman and changed his dress. One wore the watchman dress and stood outside (who fled half way for unknown reasons) , while other tried to open the ATM machine with twin dynamites. Both blasted successfully, but operation failed as he could find no money in the machine. The bankers are pressurizing the policemen to catch the man who had fled, after the failed operation empty handed, to reward him with considerable amount, for disposing the condemned ATM machine, for which they were cracking their brains for past one month.

News on page seven,

                                           “Two bodies in 2 B”

An old couple was murdered by 17 years and 364 days old boy. Boy said he needed money urgently to celebrate his 18^th birthday with his friends, on the next day in a star hotel pub.  He was arrested while dancing in the pub with his girlfriend. But before he could walk out of the hotel, clock chimed 12 times. Police released the boy as he turned 18 and wished him ‘Happy Birthday’ and he resumed dancing with his girl friend. Human rights activists pelted couple of stones on policeman for arresting a ‘minor’ boy for a minor issue. As for the old couple, their loving son, who is residing in ‘united estates’, insisted on sending their ashes, in business class of the “Pauper shark” airlines, by the boy’s family. Police is negotiating with the boy’s family.

News on page one,

                                     “Great criminal Mr.All Right arrested”

Two days back an administrative officer Mr. Doit Right was dismissed for ordering to demolish a temple built on footpath platform , which lead to a great religious unrest in that region.

Mr.Doit Right said, “Footpath platform is for people to walk. More over holy temples should be built in clean places, not on  foot path platforms”

This lead to the above said unrest. RBAAW group (Right to Built Anything Anywhere we Want group) demanded his resignation, but their protests were ignored as he was dismissed.

Mr.All Right commented on his ‘Faze book’ that, “ Mr. Doit Right has done it right. Whoever dismissed him has done it wrong”

For these heinous words which could cause national agitation and street fights between matured people , Mr.All Right, the criminal was arrested (under non bailable charges) and was dragged to the prison.

222 likes for that comment has suddenly reduced to 2 (i.e of Mr.Doit Right and Mr.All Right himself) after the arrest. Cyber crime wing is working in full swing to find out other 220 people.

Last page News,

                                  ‘Whole nation on mourning’

As 'Kapistan' won against 'Rabath' in an one day cricket match without losing a wicket!